@gtwilson Growing up in the 1980s, I remember kids calling each other a faggot, and it was definitely derogatory. I also remember the game Smear the Queer. It's a lovely game where everyone chases after the kid carrying the football to gang-tackle him. He coughs it up, someone else gets the ball, rinse and repeat until recess was over.
I think finding common ground is easy if we allow ourselves to do so. When we're kids, we're less picky and can bond with just about anyone over anything. As an adult, different story, particularly when you add in wives, kids, work, and who knows what else.